Sacrament Meeting Talk on the Atonement

This post is adapted from a talk I gave a few months ago at church. Several people have asked for a copy of the talk, and I'm finally getting around to writing it up. When I do public speaking, I never write my remarks out verbatim. Instead, I write notes of the main points I want to cover and then speak extemporaneously. As a result, instead of the text of my talk, what follows is an essay based on the same notes I used to give the talk. It will be similar but not identical.

Living Water

In the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried, saying, If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
John 7:38

After yesterday's downer, I promised a more upbeat post on the fantastic Saturday session of the mid-singles conference. So, here it is.

I arrived and mingled for a while. I met a guy who is in his last semester of law school, so we talked about law school for a bit. (There's something about the legal profession that creates an instant kinship when two people meet. I don't know why, but there it is.) I gave him a pep talk about the bar exam because he's a bit worried about it. Then we exchanged business cards. Then I ran into one of my friends who I hadn't seen in a while, and we took a seat in preparation for the keynote address.

One Lord, One Faith, One Baptism

[There is] one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all.
Ephesians 4:5-6

I attended a mid-singles conference this weekend in the Bay Area. It spanned three days, with social activities on Friday night, spiritual/educational lectures on Saturday, and a church service on Sunday. Saturday was fantastic, and my report on that can be found here. Today's church service, however, wounded my soul deeply.

The keynote speaker for today's service was Julie Beck, the general president of the Relief Society. When President Beck got up to speak, I was hoping that what had been a wonderful Christ centered conference would be concluded with yet another message focusing on the Savior. Sadly, this was not the case.

Recap of General Conference

This past weekend was General Conference. If you want to watch or listen to it, you can go here. If you want to read a good summary and commentary, visit By Common Consent.

I did massive housework while listening to conference. Sadly, I only got halfway done with my fall cleaning. (I try to do spring cleaning, but law school got in the way this year, so now that I don't have that excuse, it's fall cleaning.) So now my apartment looks worse than it did before I started. But my kitchen sparkles. I'll take care of the clutter in my living room this week.

And in other news, I now have a second cat. My neighbor moved last week, and she had an outdoor cat that she couldn't take with her. I offered to take him in, and I introduced him to my cat a few weeks ago. After two meetings, it became clear that this wasn't going to work. The cats hated each other and were constantly hissing. So my neighbor found another neighbor to feed him.

On Saturday, my neighbor came by to check on Kitty. He had been sad and moping all week, but when she showed up, he perked right up. The manager walked by and said that she was going to call the pound because he had been abandoned. (Which was totally not true.) So after the manager left, I said I would take Kitty.

I brought him inside and miraculously the two cats are tolerating one another. They still hiss at each other, but they're learning to share the food and litter box. I'm hoping they'll become friends soon. Kitty stares longingly outside. I feel bad for keeping him in, but I know if the manager sees him outside again, she'll take him to the pound. (And she's so unpleasant that I'm sure she would remove his collar first so that the pound wouldn't know to call me to come get him.)

Thoughts on General Conference - Updated

This past weekend was General Conference. (If you missed it, you can watch it here.) I generally enjoy conference, and this one was particularly good, for the most part. So, I'll start with the one thing that bugged me, and then I'll go into a much lengthier summary of what I did like.

One thing I realized is that church leaders really have no idea what the lived experience of the single member is. Several talks chastised single members for putting off marriage, basically saying that we're being selfish and worldly for being single. I would invite them to spend some time talking to and listening to those of us out here in the mission field, where Latter-day Saints are a minority. There are only so many other church members around, so it's not like there are tons of options. It's not like in Provo, where if you aren't compatible with the people in your ward or stake, you can just go down the street and meet thousands more. Out here, if I'm not compatible with the few single LDS men in my area, I'm left with the choice of staying single or dating outside the church. It's not a matter of priorities, it's a matter of population. [Update: ks has a post at Beginnings New about the marriage talks at General Conference. She asks how we can teach the youth of the church the importance of marriage.]

As a nice transition, I really appreciated Elder Holland's remarks. I'm not normally a big fan of his talks; he's usually a bit too fire and brimstone for my tastes. However, I liked what he had to say yesterday. He said that he knows that not everyone is avoiding marriage. I'm sure most people will interpret that as an apology to the married people listening that they had to hear the single people get chastised. However, I interpreted that to mean that he knows there are plenty of people who are single and in good standing with God, and that the remarks of the prior speakers were not directed to people like me.

There was a lot more Jesus at this conference than there has been in the past. I'm quite pleased with that. Elder Grow's talk was particularly great in that regard. He talked about the cleansing power of grace, and he shared a poignant story of his brother's return to the fold. I also liked Elder Perry's talk and Elder Richards's talk. Elder Richards made the excellent point that not all of our suffering is our fault, and that Christ can heal us from the sins of others as well as forgive our own sins.

I also noticed a theme of caring for the poor and needy. President Eyring, Bishop Burton, and Sister Allred all spoke on this topic. Two things stood out to me. Bishop Burton said that caring for the poor and needy is more important than missionary work and temple work. Sister Allred said that caring for the poor and needy is pure religion. (Although she didn't quote the scripture, that comes from James 1:27.)

I've been thinking a lot more lately about prophets. During the sustaining of the church officers, I had a realization. When we raise our right hand and declare before God that we believe that the members of the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles are prophets, seers, and revelators, that's a big deal.

Mormon Studies Conference

I attended the 2011 Mormon Studies Conference at Utah Valley University this past week. The conference was entitled Mormonism and Islam: Commonality and Cooperation Between Abrahamic Faiths. I enjoyed the conference. I had a chance to talk to a lot of interesting people about a lot of interesting things. I have prepared a detailed summary of the talks here.

No More Strangers

Now therefore ye are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellowcitizens with the saints, and of the household of God.

~Ephesians 2:19

Last week, I went to a J. Reuben Clark Society dinner. (I hate networking, but it's the only way to get a job, and since I'm the vice president of the student chapter, I kind of have to go to these sorts of things.) It was at the end of a really long day and I had a migraine, so I really really didn't want to be there. I'm so glad I went, though.

The guest of honor was Judge Thomas Griffith, a judge on the D.C. Circuit. After dinner, he gave a few remarks. I figured he would talk about what it's like to be a judge and give some friendly advice to the 50 or so law students present.

Stake Conference and Personal Revelation

It’s been a while since I’ve blogged. I made it through finals, more or less. (I’m still waiting for several grades. I’ll never figure out why it takes the professors so long to grade exams. It’s been over a month.) I had a week off from classes, and for the past two weeks I’ve been juggling work with an internship for credit. However, that’s not the topic of this post. (That’s the topic of tomorrow’s post.)

The topic of this post is stake conference, personal revelation, and how it’s my lot in life to be misunderstood. Today was stake conference. Elder Trythall of the Seventy was the presiding authority. This morning, before the general session, he held a meeting for all the YSAs. The meeting was a question and answer session. Nobody seemed interested in asking a question, so I opened up a can of worms by asking a question that seems to crop up frequently in the Bloggernacle, most recently at Zelophehad's Daughters in Seraphine’s excellent series about being a 30-something single in the church.

For background, I’m 28, so while I’m technically still a YSA, I’m on the way older end. As regular readers of the blog know, I’m in law school and feel strongly called to use my God-given talents in the legal profession, most likely in legal academia. This tends to make me unattractive to the typical LDS man who wants someone who is 19, blonde, and with little ambition. (I've been told that the reason I'm single is that I'm too ambitious and too smart. Don't even get me started there.) Anyway, here’s the question I asked:

Personal Revelation and the "Ideal"

I've been mulling this one over for a while, and now that I have a few moments, I decided to sit down and write it. Since most of my writing these days has consisted of law review articles, you're going to end up with footnotes. It's an occupational hazard. [1]

I find the rhetoric used in the church to describe the "ideal" to be off-putting. It's usually trotted out in the context of family relations, but it can apply in other situations as well. It goes something like this: The "ideal" is a man and a woman who married in the temple in their early 20's (after the man served an honorable full-time mission), upon which the woman got pregnant within a year or two, quit her job, and became a full-time homemaker. [2] Any other situation is "less-than-ideal" and is something that the parties to the situation should feel at least slightly bad about. We can't acknowledge these situations with more than a few off-hand comments in talks because if we focus too much on them, then the "ideal" will be compromised.

In addition to causing heartache and pain to members whose lives have, for whatever reason, taken a different path, this notion of the "ideal" is in direct contradiction to our belief in personal revelation. Personal revelation comes through the Holy Spirit, a member of the Godhead. How could following instruction from God be less than ideal?

If someone receives personal revelation on a subject that differs from the "ideal", that doesn't make acting on that revelation not ideal. That revelation creates, for that person, a different ideal. For example, I have a good friend who became very close friends with a man not of our faith. As they got closer, she prayed about it and received a prompting to marry him. She was quite surprised by this, and she asked again to make sure she had understood correctly. She had. They've been married for 10 years, and they have a wonderful marriage and family. Marrying him became her ideal.

Personal revelation can serve to liberalize, as in the above instance of marrying a nonmember, but it can also serve to make things stricter for a given individual. For example, men are expected to serve a mission, and women are not. [3] When I reached the age where I was making the decision of whether or not to serve a mission, I received a witness that I should go. This revelation, which came from God, made my personal obligation to serve equal to the obligation of any man. Serving a mission became my ideal, and I would have been disobedient to God if I had chosen not to serve.

Instead of using the term "ideal" to describe the default position, I propose we use a different term which can avoid the baggage of value judgments. Perhaps something like "general rule", "default", or another suitable synonym. Basically, the idea is "do this unless you have revelation to do it differently". This phrasing is consistent with how Elder Oaks frames the issue. He has said:

As a General Authority, I have the responsibility to preach general principles. When I do, I don’t try to define all the exceptions. There are exceptions to some rules. . . . But don’t ask me to give an opinion on your exception. I only teach the general rules. Whether an exception applies to you is your responsibility. You must work that out individually between you and the Lord.

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught this same thing in another way. When he was asked how he governed such a diverse group of Saints, he said, “I teach them correct principles, and they govern themselves.” In what I have just said, I am simply teaching correct principles and inviting each one of you to act upon these principles by governing yourself. [4]

As a people who believe in personal revelation, we need to make our speech consistent with our doctrine.

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[1] I once wrote a 7 word sentence that was followed by an 87 word footnote.
[2] In talking about the rhetoric of the "ideal", I don't mean to imply that there's anything wrong with marrying young or being a full-time homemaker.
[3] See e.g. Gordon B. Hinckley, "Some Thoughts on Temples, Retention of Converts, and Missionary Service", October 1997 General Conference, reprinted in November 1997 Ensign p. 49. Available here. (Accessed April 7, 2010). ("I say what has been said before, that missionary work is essentially a priesthood responsibility. ... We do not ask the young women to consider a mission as an essential part of their life’s program. ... Again to the sisters I say that you will be as highly respected, you will be considered as being as much in the line of duty, your efforts will be as acceptable to the Lord and to the Church whether you go on a mission or do not go on a mission.)
[4] Dallin H. Oaks, "Dating versus Hanging Out", CES Fireside May 1, 2005. Available here. (Accessed April 7, 2010).